But its 'summer' now, and much to hot to deal with the oven, lol. I want to try bagels and soft pretzels again. And cinnamon rolls. How I want cinnamon rolls! Unfortuantly the baby still can't have cinnamon as of our last trial.
I've been getting a little down about being gluten free lately too. I normally am a pretty positive person, and I can handle just about anything that comes my way... but damnit, I want a real pretzel! I want to go to the grocery store and be able to buy anything that sounds good, and forget reading the stupid label! I'm tired of the money we have to spend so I can be safe, and not sick. I'm tired of having to politely turn down offers of food.
I'm tired of having to politely tell the waitress that I can't have gluten, my kid can't have dairy and gluten, and could you please try to not poison me? In not so many words of course... And then have to politely explain that no, I do not and cannot have that toast that you put on my plate, and now I need a new plate.
I'm tired of being polite.
I'm tired of not being believed. I'm tired of the question of "Well, can't you just forget your diet for today?"
I can't forget my diet today. I can't forget my diet anyday. The word diet implies that I'm eating like this to lose weight. I'm actually quite comfortable with my weight. I'm not terribly overweight, and I'm actually right about where I should be - medically speaking. I live like this because it makes me feel better. I like not being in pain. That's the point.
Gluten is not necessary to live, or to be nutritionally right. In fact, since I can't have a LOT of the processed junk, I eat much better than you. You can go to the store and buy whatever your little heart desires. I have to read labels for every single product I buy. My trip to the store probably takes twice as long as the average shopper. The gal who orders the gluten free food for my regular store is starting to recognize me, lol.
I'm not really angry - I'm more or less just disappointed. Life isn't supposed to be so hard, right? You're not supposed to anagonize over what goes into your or your children's bodies... You're sure as hell not supposed to feel guilty when the store runs out of cheese - except your kid can only eat one specific cheese, and the next nearest store that sells it is an hour away.
It's sure as hell not supposed to take all day to figure out what to make for dinner that everyone will eat, and will be safe for everybody.
So for now, I'm just going to breathe. And be polite... Just don't be surprised when I finally crack, LOL!
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